I have talked before about my losses and gains on this journey......the friendships I no longer have as a result of my new life and in my changing, and the ones I have kept and new ones I have found.....it is hurtful when it happens.....I just had another situation come up that was another example of it.....and it is a head scratcher indeed......I know not all people are meant to stay for the entirety of your life and journey......I get it......but sometimes it is still surprising when it happens....and I am curious about the why......when it seems intentional.....not when you sort of organically drift away from somebody....a natural end to the relationship......but when it feels very deliberate......I have lost friends in every storm of my life.....losing my sister.......having Gabe......his cancer........and my divorce......and this time the stark contrast feels more pronounced.......the contrast between my true blue friends and my friends in my life that pretend......and when I was talking to my therapist yesterday, I discussed this a little bit, and said I truly only want people in my life that are loyal and true.....that are my real friends.....that don't talk about me behind my back.....no undercover haters.....people that want the best for me as I do for them.......so the thinning out process is necessary.......plus as I evolve and change more, it is causing new people to come forward that share some of the things I think and believe in my new life.....just had another door open up where I get to share my business in an ambitious woman type forum......and I am excited about that too......was appreciative to the person that shared that with me:).....felt very meant to be too, based on my goals and the things I am trying to bring into my life.....so just like the rest and what I say over and over.......I will trust always what and who falls away......I will never chase friendships or people......no need to......I have more than my fair share in my life and am grateful for every single person that has stayed and is meant to travel the next chapter with me......it means so much that they have embraced my journey and my transformation......and stayed around with open arms......it touches my heart......that may indicate that those people are meant to be my forever friends.....and what a lucky gal I am to have that.......I am finally having more time in my life to nurture my friendships now....making plans when the kids see their dad.......being intentional about spending time with my friends......it feels good to do that......I want to celebrate the end of all of it and plan a girls getaway soon too......and enjoy some time away! I guess I wrote about this this morning to honor the people that have stayed......letting them know that I see them......I feel them......I appreciate them.....and am grateful for them every day!
jperuso
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