Captivating......

I love that word.....it goes on my list of favorite words amid my love of all things language:) It means "being capable of attracting and holding interest, charming"....and that is how I have begun to feel about the story of my life now, alongside the stories of the lives I encounter.....and I suppose being captivated is what keeps me enchanted with life, and all of its twists and turns....and in the consciousness of recognizing them......and truthfully I have begun to anticipate and appreciate the journey......no matter where it leads....like reading a novel.....and being excited to turn the page......wondering what lies in the rest of the chapter or in the chapters ahead......and I think becoming captivated and surrendering to the journey has allowed for the enjoyment I now feel......not fighting it or hiding my eyes at what lies ahead.....I wrote awhile back about coming across old journals.....journals ladened with pleas to the powers that be for peace, and forced positive rhetoric, self soothing words to help calm my inner storms at the time, just raging within, and for good reasons, life was challenging then.....and reading it was cathartic, but as I think of being captivated today, I understand the difference.....and really all that positive self talk once upon a time helped bring me here......creating a habit if you will.....faking it till I made it....and now it isn't feigned it is authentic......authentically knowing that every moment is meant for me....every one.....and I have come to whisper to myself over and over when the going gets challenging or muddied, everything is always working out for me......because I now believe it......truly......and viewing my life as a novel feels fun and lovely:) and it has been quite the story so far, the hallmarks of an 80s soap opera at certain points lol:) But also a story of so many other things, and human condition stuff....and intuitively I feel I have many more chapters left to write as I continue to live my truth:) Twisting and turning as I go.......surprise endings, and beginnings on repeat.....as I type this today I am blessed enough to be sitting beside Lake Champlain with my folks, and my kids, getting ready to adventure at Ausable Chasm.....considered the Grand Canyon of the East Coast.....and following my intuitive nudges, and compass now has elevated the journey for me.......helping me find the places I am supposed to be.....on the way here my number 11 appeared often, letting me know I was on the right path, and in the address of this place:) And then I arrived to a railing filled with dragonflies, just put in recently by the way, and if you have been reading for awhile, well you know:) And so I am RIGHT where I am supposed to be this morning......feeling blessed to be....and excited for what the day holds! And the beautiful sights to behold....I think the hallmark of this chapter for me has been the adventuring! Realizing the importance of really living in 3D, seizing the opportunity to see things.....even for a couple of days here and there....Doesn't need to be expensive necessarily, just out in the world....and this morning finds me feeling blessed about all I have been able to experience and see in the last 4 years and the memories I have made with my kids......so cheers to more memories! Enjoy the day:) We are planning on it:)