Dead weight!

So today I approach this topic kinda delicately, not wishing to barge right in;-) After my divorce nearly 5 years ago, I know right? That is hard to believe......time is a strange thing....slipping by while life is doing its thang, and then all of a sudden the years pile up.....so in that space after the excruciating part, I felt this levity visit my life....feeling my spirit and EVERYTHING about my life, feel lighter....... and more blessed, and easier in a true sense.....and in that awareness, I realized that another person, or a relationship you no longer belong in, can drain your spirit and seek to crush your vibration.....and I never really thought about that before that.....not like that.....and so part of what people have noticed about me in the last couple of years.....is a lighter spirit, more buoyancy......more happiness, more joy.....I have been FREE of fear and worry.....and have just been able to elevate my spirit in ways I never knew were possible.....so as that lesson took hold, the clarity and realization finding me.... I suddenly found myself feeling some of that again in the friendship/relationship I left behind in March....and to be honest it was because I felt the drain beginning.....THAT feeling.....having to lower my own vibration to meet him in his space......and my peace started to be threatened.....and I was being asked if I was willing to sacrifice all of that....and the answer was NO......BUT here is an interesting thing......in the full absence of it all now, and for a sustained amount of time......I feel another level of levity finding me AGAIN!:):) Lighter in places that I didn't realize had been weighted down by him and my relationship with him.....and I believe that some people sorta hijack our energy......seeking to have it feed their own......and I was feeling that....so fully.....and the only way we can fully know what a drain something is, is in the absence of it all.....and I am being shown again that valuable lesson....and this past time I chose for myself, recognizing the draining energy.....but if I hadn't had my life thrown off a cliff 5 years ago....and been pushed into the abyss, I would have likely continued to be depleted and destroyed by it all....I like to think I would have reached my own point....but I am not sure....my attachment to my family being so fierce then, and I was a different woman....and the desire to keep it in tact, sacrificing myself for that end was in every fiber of my being at the time....but maybe....but I certainly wasn't THIS woman.....the one that sees all of that with new eyes and through her new life......and really there are no other places in my life that are draining me.....so that makes me feel so excited about another rise......:) People insidiously start to drain our lives....without us even realizing......and we lose the pieces one by one....the peace day by day...and we keep telling ourselves it will get better, or it will change.....and it just won't......if a person is wired to drain energy....and they are not seeking to change.....they will only drain energy.....and it isn't judgement, any of this.....it is truly just an observation.....people all carry their own human condition......they do.....and all this is about today for me, is the expression of this, and more awareness that has found me.....and realizing that I am feeling the difference AGAIN.....an even lighter place.....and this time I kept my vibe up through most of it, but it took a lot of energy to do that.....and it was only because we were long distance.....likely if he had been closer, it would have ended sooner, or his impact on my vibe and energy would have been worse.....but here is what I will say.....a person draining your energy and spirit is no small thing......we need to be mindful of the people we have in our lives.....and be selective about who we let in.....and who we let have access to us.....I REALLY believe that now that I have lived in the contrast....and realizing again how close I came to allowing all of my hard work to be shattered in the name of love.....so yea......I am excited about this next chapter.....feeling fully UNENCUMBERED and FREE in all of the best ways:):).....and I won't be finding myself in any relationships where my light and energy is used to fuel another.....I am seeking somebody that has their own to share with me:) What would that be like:) I have always been the power source in the story.....having people plug in.....and take my energy.....and that part of my life is over.....and I would never have realized it if I didn't FEEL the contrast in their absence SO FULLY......so yea....following my lighter dancing spirit to wherever she leads, and still so damn proud of her for freeing herself and being stronger than her feelings! Amen:)