Let's PARTY!!!!

My 50th birthday is coming in hot........I have mentioned that I will be 50 in May.....and I wasn't sure how I wanted to celebrate........my parents asking me if I wanted a party.....not sure if a surprise would be something I wanted......and we batted some ideas around and options.....one of them being at a place in our area, and having it be expensive per head etc......and it is a good amount of people.....and that just seemed, like a waste.....and totally not like me......like a mini wedding reception vibe if you will, cost and room.......standing around a big room, is not how I want to spend my birthday......I am going with my girls from work again to the lake house we went to, and will be having a girl's weekend, which we had such a lovely time last time.....a little extra time away, but celebrating, the milestone of 50 seems like it is worthy for sure....and so we finally settled on a party that is outdoors in a lovely spot.....it will either be at my house, or on a friend's property, they have an outdoor party spot that is beautiful......and well that feels like me:) And I was proud of not settling into what felt uncomfortable and not like me.....like fully knowing that it didn't resonate.....because there was a time in my life where I just rolled with stuff to make it easier, but in this case I did not want my parents to have the expense of all of that, when it didn't feel like me at all.....and I am guessing when I sit down, and do names family and friends it may be around 100 people or maybe a little more......and hanging outside and having space to roam free sounds just right to me.....music......conversation.....cozy vibes, and beautiful nature surrounding it all.....and there it is. And I am glad now that we pivoted that I didn't not opt for the offered party, I mean let's face it besides, I do love a good party ;-) celebrating with those I love is my favorite:) So I am thinking May will shape up to be a celebratory month of sorts.....pockets of doing all the things that I LOVE, and celebrating with those I love, and with those that have made these 50 years meaningful, and have supported and loved on me......I am excited too, because I am acquiring a piece of furniture from my cousin.....he has lived in my grandparent's house, having bought it after they passed.....and he is now moving. And on the breezeway at my grandparent's house there was a big long bench that was built, and a beautiful table.....and my memories of that table were of listening to stories told around it by the people I loved most.....my grandfather commanding the room with his big presence and huge laugh, and he offered it to me, and while I do not have the best place for it right now, I am reconfiguring my dining and workout space some to make it work....because imagining it in my retreat space someday soon seems just perfect:) And I could not let that table go.....too many beautiful things happening there......so much love and laughter....so that feels like a birthday gift from those people that I love that are no longer here.....and because I shared my birthday with my Nanna, she was one of my soul people, we truly got one another so fully, and I miss her so much........and I already have my Nanna's dining room table, she told me she would haunt me if I ever sold it lol:) You would have to have known her to fully understand the humor in that ;-) so having those tables is meaningful, amid my birthday season coming up. I have a lot to celebrate....it has been an arduous walk to this point in lots of ways......but also a magical one......and I am so looking forward to spending the Month doing all that I love with abandon and truly as my new chapter unfolds, I believe I am just getting started! I got lots to do in the next 50 years! Happy Friday! We made it! xoxo