Making legal changes!

Today I am planning on finally moving forward on legally regaining my maiden name....I have been using it on social media and a few other places I was able to.....but most of my life holds my married name....for legal purposes, and it is time.....I have been dragging my feet some on it, because it is a huge pain.....SO much holds that name.....and it will take me some time to work it all out.....but the time is now while I am off.....I am also planning on getting a real ID, and eventually a passport for the kids and I.....so my name needs to be correct......and as connected as I am to my kids and our party of three, I truly am:)....it was never a question for me as to whether I would keep his name or not....I haven't wanted to from the jump and the very beginning of this story.....almost from the moment he walked out the door......even if it matches my kids.....and I understand deeply why moms choose to.....I really do.......and I am sad some that I won't share that with them anymore....but in my mind, it is very clear that it is not my name anymore.....not something I share with their dad or should share with him, not willing to carry it all of my life.....we are no longer joined, or aligned, or any of it......and so it feels very clear to me that I want to regain my maiden name.....being proud to have that name......a long line of folks having that name that I am proud to call my own:) And when I think of myself now that is who I identify with.......not my married name.......my daughter felt some kind of way initially....and we talked about it....my explaining to her that that is something and she and her brother share with their dad, not me anymore....and that it doesn't belong to me any longer.....and she asked about changing her own name too someday......and I told her she could one day, but that she would need to be grown to make that decision, and it is a big decision. I also told her that we are still very much connected, even if our last names don't match and she need not worry about that:).....and we left it at that.....for now she understands, and is past the part of feeling angst that it won't be my name anymore....but it is overwhelming to think of all the places I will have to contact, and prove my new name to so I can change it, yikes! It almost makes it seem easier to just remain carrying it around....except I cannot.....my soul won't allow it.....knowing deeply it is something I NEED to do....so my first step is to contact my divorce lawyer's office today and get the piece of paper I need and go from there......and part of me wishes I had done it sooner....but I suppose all those things happen in their own time.....my feeling more than ready to disconnect from an identity that doesn't feel like me at all.......no emotional attachment at all........a person that I no longer identify with, or resonate with, not feeling like a Mrs. anything;-).....and when I hear that name used that is what it makes me think.......of my Mrs. days......and I am most definitely a Ms. now, sometimes even feeling like a Miss lol:) ....and as I have had my life transform in the ways it has, that transformation has created a new person.....no doubt......but she was also rooted in who she was before.....sparks of her originating before she met my ex.....so having that name again seems fitting......it will feel worth all the effort I am exerting to see it in print everywhere......I know that......I just have to dig in and do the thing:) Another step in regaining myself and wholeness.....shedding stuff that doesn't belong here anymore, Amen:)