IT just feels better.....

As old wounds swirl round......not just related to my divorce but beyond.....I am reminded of a powerful truth.....taking the high road as much as you are able just feels better, I promise it does.......I have had many friends say to me, The high road is your road Jenn.......especially in the times early on when I wanted to burst......send a scathing text, or make a phone call that would just cause more conflict and heartache.....and it is in those moments.....when we have the power to regain composure.....delete it all, and say OK.....now that is not to say that I have not had to address stuff and speak truth.....but I have tried hard to do it with respect and stick to what needs to be addressed....but even more than that.....we get to be us no matter the circumstance.....letting somebody pull you out of character....allows them to win....fully.....sinking to their level, or saying ugly things you regret later, or letting somebody pull you under, is all stuff that allows for their victory, not yours.....and I have gotten caught up from time to time, I am human indeed lol:) but overall, I have truly learned that my power lies in staying up above the stuff I don't want to be a part of .......speaking my truth from my heart, and the real stuff, the heart of the matter....not from pain or deflection or inner wound stuff......and it just feels better....it really does.....and I think sometimes as humans we think it will feel so damn good to verbally lay somebody out.......just go all in, let them have it, and say all the things, and lose control and breathe fire, especially in a situation that wounds us deeply, or where emotions run high......but that may feel like relief for a second, but then it is the after you have to live with.....and it is what has kept me strong in doing my best to not do that......knowing that I have to live with me ultimately......face my own decisions, my own actions, my own word choices....lay my head on my pillow and know my truth......so I want that to be a truth that reflects me, my heart, my values, my life, my truth......and the example I set for my children......they are watching it all......and someday they will have a story from this time....and it won't be that their mom was angry and bitter....or lost and scared or angry........and that is worth every effort I have had to make to walk this way.....they see a happy and healing mom......one that laughs and sings and dances with them....completely devoted to them above all else......and gives grace to their dad often, and speaks positively about him.....and we choose our legacy in this life.....what is remembered about us when we are old and gray....not to mention it just feels better, did I mention that;-) beyond the legacy it is for OUR PEACE too.....not having that terrible jangled feeling inside of our body.....the one that drama and negativity breeds......but a steady presence....that is not subject to low vibin stuff.......it isn't worth it....if you are reading and you wanna lay somebody out, even if they deserve it......I get it I do.....but it just isn't worth it....your peace and well being and legacy are far more important than any words that can be spoken in anger....and ones that then live in regret......Happy Saturday, enjoy the day:)