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jperuso

This may sound strange...but.........

I have tried a few times to write about something that is hard to articulate.....and will try again this morning:) From the moment that my ex left, my life has been catapulted into the space of spiritual journey.....in every way....and it is was not me just seeking out spiritual means to cope and evolve.....although that happened too......however, much of what I have found and discovered has little to do with me at all.....and found me, quite literally........if you are the praying type or the "that was a sign" type.....or both like me:) Then you know that when you see a sign, or get some spiritual confirmation it is FELT......deeply and clearly.....and at least for me mysteriously......I just KNOW when those things find me.....and I cannot fully explain the knowing part, or how I do.....but I have for sure come to trust it all......and I suppose as I am examining it some this morning, it has evolved too.....perhaps being brought to my attention when my sister passed.....the first real intense explosion in my life in my late 20s......and the dragonflies we saw, and felt, and experienced in her absence, allowing me a peek into a realm I hadn't thought about much, or spent much time trying to understand.....and it was then that my curiosity for all of it was piqued.....so that was the beginning of my expansion beyond my belief in God, and some of my faith journey.....and then the noise of life took hold again, and dulled my senses, and I was lulled back into life......and not that stuff wasn't happening.....big stuff.....my ex and a cancer diagnosis.....the birth of our special needs son.....the loss of so much.....and everything in between......but I had too much surviving to do I think, to spend too much time contemplating any of it.....and then my ex left....and my world was imploding in a full, and exquisitely excruciating way, and I was left all alone in the silence of my new life.....and it was in that silence that I began to hear:) Funny how that is.....and all sorts of magic and universal goodness took hold.....divine timing and divine appointments.....and I have learned about so much......about manifesting....meditation, surrender, letting go, faith, divine timing.....and vibration.....the power in nature, and the universal role in the divine.....and so much more.....but in that space, signs and intuitive nudges happen for me that spark inspired action......and I say all of this to front load the explanation for yesterday morning:) I know that was a lot lol:) Bear with me;-) So I was thinking on some things in the morning.....keeping worry at bay and reframing the things I was thinking on......defaulting to trust and faith, but there were definitely things concerning me....... and then I went out to run, and I had a song in mind on Youtube so I opened it up to put it on, and one of those "you are not seeing this video by accident" messages came up as the first video....and I normally do not click....I mean who does;-) but something told me to.....and the video played as I got ready, and confirmed all of it.....all of the things I have been experiencing....fully articulated.....fully explained....wildly comforting, and the timing of it was just what I needed.....at that moment....exactly.....and I know it is hard to understand if you are not me, or if it hasn't happened to you, I get that......but the world and life has taken on a hi def quality for me that it did not always have in this part of my life....and I am in tune with so much more than I once was.....and have taken the time to explore all that has come my way, but also spent a great deal of time going within to hear so much more......And yesterday morning felt like a mini spiritual journey all its own lol:) All before 7;30 in the morning! And while it is hard to explain sometimes or fully articulate......and sometimes it can make me feel isolated, it is never any less beautiful and fascinating to me.....and it feels like a gift to my life....and I will continue to listen and follow where it leads:) Enjoy the day!!!

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